A Contagious Smile Podcast
A Contagious Smile is a powerful platform dedicated to uplifting and empowering special needs families and survivors of domestic violence. Through heartfelt stories, we shine a light on the journeys of extraordinary individuals who have overcome unimaginable challenges. Their triumphs serve as a testament to resilience and strength, inspiring others to rediscover their own inner light. Each episode features candid interviews with survivors, advocates, and experts who provide valuable resources and insights to support those on their own paths to healing and empowerment. Join us as we celebrate the power of resilience, the beauty of shared stories, and the unstoppable spirit of those who turn adversity into hope. Let us guide you in rekindling your spirit, because every smile tells a story of courage and transformation.
A Contagious Smile Podcast
When Blood Isn't Thicker Than Water
What would you do if you witnessed a violent attack in public? Would you step in to help, or freeze in the moment? This raw, unfiltered conversation begins with Michael and Victoria discussing a disturbing video of a random stabbing at Walmart, questioning why bystanders failed to intervene when they had the power to stop the threat.
The couple doesn't shy away from difficult topics as they share their perspectives on self-defense, situational awareness, and the Good Samaritan Law that protects those who step up in dangerous situations. Their passion for protecting others extends beyond physical safety into the emotional realm, where they've created an academy offering affordable healing resources for survivors of abuse.
Victoria opens up about her experiences with narcissistic family members, detailing the manipulation tactics like silent treatment and blame-shifting that defined these relationships. The painful authenticity in her voice resonates as she describes how narcissists refuse accountability and twist situations to make victims feel responsible for abuse. Michael's supportive presence highlights how healing relationships can develop even after experiencing profound betrayal from those who should have provided safety and love.
The conversation shifts to parenting concerns about today's screen-obsessed youth, the couple's shared joy in their strong family bonds, and Victoria's upcoming medical procedures resulting from past abuse. Their natural banter and occasional humor provide welcome relief from heavy topics while showcasing the genuine connection that defines their relationship and podcast.
Whether you're navigating complex family dynamics, recovering from abuse, or simply interested in authentic conversations about life's challenges, this episode offers validation, perspective, and hope. Subscribe now to join this supportive community where healing is prioritized and real talk is always on the menu.
and her hello welcome back to another episode of the state of smile podcast with your sexy host, victoria, and michael, the guy in the background howdy y'all. You're never in the background, ever, never, ever. You're my redneck, I'm your redhead, right, yes?
Speaker 1:So to start off, I see, I saw, I seen them first A short video of an evil man running around Walmart stabbing folks.
Speaker 2:Oh my god, what the crap is going on in this house.
Speaker 1:What I saw was a man stabbing folks at random erratically running through Walmart and what I didn't see was any dads, any men stepping up to stop the threat. Okay, if I'm in Walmart with my wife and my daughter, you better believe it. We're armed Okay, that's number one.
Speaker 1:But if I saw this erratic behavior, I'm going to, of course, keep my family safe, but I'm going to do something about it because I can. You know, that's my God-given right. Where were the men at to tackle this SOB? You know, to throw something at him. I'm taking a whole rack of clothes and throw it at him. Okay, Am I wrong in this? What?
Speaker 2:do you think there, victoria no, I mean the video we saw like I picked up a, can that?
Speaker 1:they were in the can aisle that.
Speaker 1:I would have picked up a can and chucked it in right, or at least trick them down and you know, subdue them, which you have the right to do and hold them until they survive there's not going to be a lawyer that's going to fault you for and you know subdue them, which you have the right to do and hold them at all. Exactly, please survive. There's not going to be a lawyer that's going to fault you, for you know tackling this man or you know hitting him with something.
Speaker 2:No, in its own way it's self-defense, because he didn't he didn't even just like strategically, just go up to somebody.
Speaker 1:He was zigzagging everywhere, right it was chaotic. It was chaotic and random it wasn't like, okay, this person's in my peripheral site right, I'm only doing that for washington right and he was just like everyone.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it was any and everyone that's just crazy, but see you know a lot of people are afraid if they're out in public and you stop the threat that they're going to be incarcerated for whatever happens to the individual that they Right.
Speaker 1:That's why we have the Good Samaritan Law to protect the civilians for doing an act that may constitute violence in most cases, but you're stopping a threat. You had the intention of stopping a threat. You had the intention of stopping the threat and, like I told my wife earlier, there's no telling what he could have coated that knife with.
Speaker 2:What if?
Speaker 1:he had AIDS. I know, I think AIDS stays live for about four hours.
Speaker 2:I'm not sure.
Speaker 1:But he could have covered in fecal matter His foot, okay, his own blood. It could have been hepatitis C. You're going to get it if it's covered in this fecal matter. And then what you got to live with that the rest of your life. Why? Because nobody stopped him or you didn't stop him.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:I know it was an isolated incident. I hope it is. But, guys, if you have the right and you're a trained legal American citizen, carry your firearm. You know, they may permit with it too, obviously, yeah.
Speaker 2:Well, a lot of people don't.
Speaker 1:They might leave home without it. You know, Maybe they might leave it on their dressing room. And then do what me and my family do. My family and I, we go out to the gun range, we practice, we train and we teach our kid how to properly use a firearm and we tell them keep your head out of that foam, keep your head on a swivel, look around. Till this day, my wife and I still still do not sit with our back to a door right.
Speaker 1:Okay, it has to be a very special occasion where I'm sitting next to my daughter because it's her birthday or or something she said daddy won, why don't you sit next to her? I want to sit next to Mom, but most of the time my wife and I we're facing the exits. You know, we see our surroundings, we know what's going on around us. The other day we were in Firehouse Subs and we were waiting on our subs my daughter and I and there was two state troopers next to us sitting at the table eating and I'm very observant.
Speaker 1:I look at everybody right and my wife. We're very secure in our marriage. It don't matter if it's a man or woman. We're sitting there and a black male walks in and I noticed in his right pocket the shape of a gun. And as he passed by me. I saw the butt of the gun and, for whatever reason, he didn't have a magazine in there.
Speaker 1:But as he passed by, I alerted the two state troopers beside me that that gentleman right behind me had a firearm. And so, man, that's just courtesy I want to know was.
Speaker 2:I carrying it.
Speaker 1:Yes, did they see it?
Speaker 2:They probably did when I walked in, because I carry, you know, a big Kimber .45 or my Colt .45.
Speaker 1:I carry a large weapon. Yeah, I'm a big guy, I can do that. My wife carries a teeny weapon.
Speaker 2:You carry a teeny weapon. I'm not walking around carrying a .22. Come on now. It's just a bug.
Speaker 1:You know what. But she's got a nice little .380. It's cute, I mean. I'm sorry, it's badass.
Speaker 2:It's badass, baby. I saw a video and I know how fake. Watch it where a woman was trying to get into her vehicle. She looked down at her friend for just a second and then I came up behind her and grabbed her.
Speaker 1:It was that fast and I was like this is how fast it can happen. They can get into your vehicle, they can take your stuff you know a car can be replaced, whatever can be replaced you cannot that's right, right. It's not worth it. It is not worth it and it's just.
Speaker 2:You know, it's so scary when you think about like. I remember when the movie theater shooting started right and like, and you go in there, you're in there to watch a movie, and then you know people would say every time the door opened. I was like then why did you go? Right, I mean that movie is going to come out eventually. You already waited this long for it to come out.
Speaker 1:I mean why?
Speaker 2:take an unnecessary risk. It's just not advantageous, right. It just doesn't make sense as to do that. And then some people have like absolutely zero filter, which is really, really rude. And I just want to touch on this for a second, because you know, we have this academy where every course is valued at several hundred dollars and we're doing it for either very low cost, like under five dollars, or free, so that people can get the healing they need, because it shouldn't come with a price tag.
Speaker 2:So I am in over like 1800 groups right, and so I go in there and I tell people that these courses have been created by survivors and that it's not a textbook course, and that's what makes it different than everything else. And we've won awards for our academy. Like it's not, like there's something we've made. We have been acknowledged globally and ranked that we have the number one support network for survivors and special needs thank y'all for listening and and voting because we had to be nominated and we, you know, were given these prestigious awards.
Speaker 2:And and the thing is is I had some person who was an admin of a group for abused people like read how I went through and what I went through and then made a comment that they thought it was funny and I wrote back what is funny, like what is funny about a woman who was pregnant, who fought for their life Not just my life, but my unborn child's life and it just it's mind boggling that you know, some people think they're this bad-ass person on the other side of a keyboard. And now I found out people you know, not only in Minecraft, but you know Snapchat roadblocks. They're all posing as younger people. Like, I already knew that people are posing as younger people, but, like Snapchat, are you kidding?
Speaker 2:People are posing as you know younger people to get information and and get into talking with kids and trading pictures and things like that, and it's what is safe now for our family? What is truly safe now? And that's the question that nobody can seem to give an honest answer to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we have at least two of our children. They're well, they're not children. They're, you know, 19 to 20 now, but they're mostly introverts, so they stay at home. And you know now? But they're mostly introverts, so they stay at home and their world revolves around video games and cell phones. That's just this generation growing up. I don't know how to get them out of it. You cut the line, you cut the umbilical cord, you cut them off and then you've got Dr Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:I just have a huge issue with. I've always been someone who is not fond of video games. I've never been fond of video games Don't do it, Don't do it. And I've never been fond of video games I mean we don't. Today there's no video games like Frogger or Breakout or anything like that, like those games don't exist anymore, right? But then my husband at dinner tonight is telling me about a video game that he's playing, where he takes a shower with his. I don't even know what it was oh, is that another npc character?
Speaker 2:okay, that's japanese to me, because I don't even know what that is but like you know, and then not long ago they called me down and I went downstairs and they're like killing zombies and I'm like this is just disgusting and I'm so against it. And they're like over there dead people, they're not real, they're bleeding and you're mutilating and decapitating and amputating right like hello. I see my arm don't, don't watch this. I hate it. I think they should like. That's just me personally, but I since the games have become more graphic violence among younger adults has become more prevalent.
Speaker 2:That is a fact. It is a fact, you know. People say where'd you learn to shoot while you're dead? Oh, on my Game Boy or my Xbox or my whatever. You didn't learn how to shoot on your Atari when you had a little joystick joystick. You don't learn how to do that, right, you didn't. And that just infuriates me that the kids are given these tools for babysitting, like oh, I don't have to watch them, they're gonna get lost in the sea you know dinner, and then they don't take showers until their hair is greasy, and then they don't want to change clothes and they go to sleep with their headphones on and they can do all this.
Speaker 2:But then if you ask them, you know, hey, hand me a phillips head screwdriver. Oh, they don't know what a phillips head screwdriver is, and that's true it is true and it's you know. Come on, let's do manual labor, let's go outside. This is a thing, called outdoors. There's a thing called a backyard. Let's go out there and make some memories and spend some time together and when we had the other kids, our other kids.
Speaker 1:Here we don't get very much because they don't want to come away from their television it is.
Speaker 2:I need a break. I need to go back inside and play after like 10 minutes because that's all they want, right? And I love our son. I've loved him since he was teeny, tiny little. I change his diapers, right, and he comes over in his suitcase and the only thing he has in the suitcase is his pants. Fine, and that blows my mind like how he's a great kid and he's super smart. But why is it that we are not really trying to lift these kids up and give them more self-esteem? When I say to him how incredibly smart he is, he looks at me and goes you think so? Really? Yes, I do, I think he's brilliant. He's so smart like we get those 3d puzzles or whatever, and and he puts them together and like no time flat, but he wants to go right back to the video game.
Speaker 2:Right, and it's. Do you realize how smart you are? Do you see how smart you are? And their self-esteem is so like low because they don't get that interaction, and that's not okay it really upsets me and it just makes me want to like, look at certain parents that think that these are electronic babysitters and ask them what the hell is your malfunction?
Speaker 1:So I think that they need another focus, another motivation, something different. You get a girlfriend. Guess what those 19-hour video games goes down to?
Speaker 2:four. No, they play together on the if they play together, that's different.
Speaker 1:Okay, you get a job that 18 hours goes down to three to four hours a lot of kids date people they play with on the games they never know.
Speaker 2:They consider them like our girlfriend or whatever you know, and it's like oh, they're from zimbabwe or whatever you know, and that's who I'm dating and yeah, yeah, yeah, you know it's just like wow you know, it's mind-blowing to me. And then, uh, I just realized that it's the anniversary coming up of the release of Mark. Mark, he's there.
Speaker 1:Already.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Yo, it's been a year since this was released. The 43rd book that my wife will be publishing.
Speaker 2:And it's just. You know, kids today don't even want to pick. I want to feel a book in my hand. Singular I want to turn the pages and people like isn't that easier for you to have like a kindle or something? Yeah, it would be, but I don't get to feel the paper, I don't get to turn the page.
Speaker 2:I just scroll up right and right and I can't stand it. I want, and I have one hand. So I want to know what everybody else's excuse is, why they don't want to hold a book in their hand. They just want to. You know it's inconvenient or it's this or it's that Really? No, it's not. You know you're taking away one of life's greatest pleasures. Sit out, our world is on the hill.
Speaker 1:It's just.
Speaker 2:I mean there's no other way to summarize it.
Speaker 1:So, speaking of books, y'all get on Amazon and type in Victoria Curie and look at the books that she has published out there.
Speaker 2:They're not all on Amazon.
Speaker 1:Correct, but pay particular attention to the two the one in this other one we mentioned, the one in this other one we mentioned. The NARC book is a prequel to her first book, which is a memoir, and it's called who Kicked First.
Speaker 2:So check out.
Speaker 1:Who Kicked First?
Speaker 2:and.
Speaker 1:NARC. Narc, who's there, and, like I said, she's got several others in there. Our daughter has written and published five books. They're fabulous. Been a partaker of one of them. In fact, I was the main character of one of them. Thank you very much, Boy. What's wrong with your middle finger, babe? It has Tourette's. It has Tourette's. Okay. So my wife's currently getting ready to publish another one called Dear Silence and be on the lookout for it.
Speaker 1:Like I said, if y'all jump on our academy, go through a Contagious Small website, you can see what all is offered through our academy. There's well over 100 courses in there and some of them are master class material. It should be priced in the hundreds and my wife won't do it. She said we will not do it If a survivor is coming out of an abusive relationship trying her or his damnedest to make it possible to survive and thrive for her kids or his kids and be there for their family.
Speaker 1:She's not going to gouge them, she's not going to overcharge. That's why a lot of the classes are like $4.95. And if you act now, it's still $4.95. I don't think that you should have to pay the fuel.
Speaker 2:That's just what bothers me so much, and you go back and you think about it Like I look at it from my point of view where I went through this by myself back then.
Speaker 2:I wish something was like this out there. I mean, there was courses out there, but back then they were like $800, $900. Back then they were like eight, nine hundred dollars and you know, I was trying to figure out how I was even gonna, you know, get the supplies that faith needed at that point every month. I was living on like four hundred dollars a month and that's insanely crazy and it's the sacrifices that you make for your child.
Speaker 2:That's what you do and you don't hesitate, unless you have bio parents, like we do, but that's a whole other story and it's it's what you do for your kids and I I just believe in paying it forward and helping those that need it. You know I really do. And at dinner tonight it really grabbed my heart because you know the kids that have been going through the the trenches of any kind of medical obstacles, because I don't like saying critical, chronic, disabled, I don't like saying any of those terms um people lead their lives and you know what shame on you if you're listening.
Speaker 2:Shame on you, because what the hell did they do to you? You know, and one day you might be in that exact same spot, or worse, and you are going to know what it feels like to be all alone. Now.
Speaker 1:Faith wouldn't do it faith would be right there regardless.
Speaker 2:But to go through something and know there's a 99.9 chance that you are not coming home and that you know you, you've all you've been offered to be comfortable, um, and then you fight through it, you know I mean, and then to abandon them because they're not used to you right now, and it's not just faith that this has happened to it's happened to my husband.
Speaker 2:It's happened to me. I am beyond honored and blessed. Right now I'm working with this amazing girl who is just a spirit to be reckoned with, and she knows who she is and she's going through the same thing and it's like how can you do that? You know, you can pick, your nose, you can pick your ass, but you can't pick your family I guess, you know, and what a loss for everybody else it's not a loss for us, it's a loss for them, because in these days and times you are not going to find a more loyal, understanding giving person who will sit by your side because they get it and they understand it and they know how to do it, you know and then you turn around and just crap all over them.
Speaker 2:I don't know how you look at yourself in the mirror that's all I've got to say, especially when it comes to kids like young kids or whatever. I don't know how you look at yourself in the mirror. You know I just ugliness spews out from the inside and that's horrible how you can just I mean at some point in time you're gonna need somebody for something, and I don't believe in karma, I don't believe it's mine to give. Sometimes I am human.
Speaker 1:I want to hear about it, don't get it wrong, but I will get it.
Speaker 2:I will not give karma, um, but I do want to hear about it. And the thing is, is that you think about these beautiful children like that go through this pain and suffering lifelong and they fight why do? They fight because they know they're loved.
Speaker 2:You know, they know like when you're in the NICU, girls outlive boys statistically and if you have two identical kiddos, and one has a loving parent that's there by their side, loving on them, talking to them, singing to them, reading to them, interacting with them. And then you have a another infant with the same exact situation and they have nobody but the doctors and nurses. That baby's not going to fight as hard because they feel no need to. Why why should I fight this hard? And I know, and that goes all the way up into the you know older ages too. You People die alone.
Speaker 1:They die of a broken heart.
Speaker 2:These are all things that are real and I don't understand how some people have their heads in their asses. That's just Okay. I'm raw today, I guess.
Speaker 1:No, my wife and I saw it many, many a day, as we stayed with our faith for two and a half months, and then we were only home for a very short period of time.
Speaker 2:We were back in again.
Speaker 1:Right Day in and day out we saw bed after bed, Nobody Children in there, young, you know, toddlers Up to teens. Oh my God, it was so heartbreaking because you know we would stay with our daughter as much as I physically could, working a full-time job and I never left Taking care of dogs Right and we would walk the hallways just to get a little exercise, but be right there by our daughter and we almost never saw people. Family members in certain kids' rooms. It was so disheartening, it was crazy.
Speaker 2:I mean, we had a kid who was three doors down?
Speaker 1:who?
Speaker 2:died alone and it broke my heart. Remember I was so devastated. I mean, they had the clergy in there and you know the thing is, is you just want to grab the parent?
Speaker 2:I don't care if you're at work, you can get another job right. I don't care if you're at work, you can get another job right. I don't care what the excuse is. You know you have other kids. If you get a phone call that says this child's not going to make it through the day and you can't be there and that child dies alone, I mean that just that chokes me up because I don't understand it.
Speaker 2:I mean, I don't get it, even if you brought your other kids and put them in the waiting area they'll put, they'll bring a nurse or somebody to sit out there so you can be in there with your child at that point, Right, and one of the nurses did say that they tried to call the family and you know a lot of people say, oh, my kids in the hospital it's like a daycare or a babysitting service, and it's not not all people are like that, but you know from for someone's point of view who has lived in the hospital with their kid.
Speaker 2:You know we were in the make you, take you, pick you for basically the first six months. You know most of the, I would say the majority of the kids were alone. I understand if they're working to keep the insurance but, you best believe. Somebody's going on disability long-term disability, short-term disability and somebody's coming by every night as soon as they're off work. I couldn't concentrate on work, I'd be fired. I'd be fired because I'd be like no, I have to be there, I don't care, I don't care, I don't care, I just don't understand.
Speaker 1:I don't know where we're going with any of this. When we first started this podcast, we do everything unscripted up here we just kind of say whatever's on our mind A lot of time, you know, with my wife and I. It's about family.
Speaker 2:Well, and then I saw a video the other day of a I don't even want to call him a dad. I'm going to put him in the same category and say he's a sperm donor. He had a two-day-old baby and killed his baby. You know what the hell is the matter with you. I mean seriously, what is wrong with you? These people you know, and then they want to cry. Don't leave me in gen pop, don't put me out there. They're going to hurt me.
Speaker 2:Well, what about that baby? What about that baby? Right, you're going to sit there and cry and complain that you don't want to get hurt. Well, do you think that that baby wanted to get hurt? Do you think that baby didn't want to survive? I mean, what about the baby's rights? That just irritates me. You know, I don't know how.
Speaker 1:You know, he's not even a father.
Speaker 2:No, he's a donor. How could?
Speaker 1:you destroy your child like that.
Speaker 2:I understand. I can't grasp it. I don't understand it. It took me over 40 solid years to really have an eye opening on my biological parents and I keep telling that to Faith that she's very lucky that she's seen it so early. We've always told her to make her own decisions and not try to taint the water, so to speak, with her. But you know, you think about like things that have been done and when we almost lost her, um, all we heard was I tried, I made a phone call.
Speaker 2:You made a phone call, a phone call you knew, he knew, she knew that we were there, they knew where we were and one phone call is supposed to be okay.
Speaker 1:I mean, you know your side didn't do it mine didn't do it.
Speaker 2:And then, all of a sudden, my bio dad turns around and says to her you know, I want to put it behind, didn't do it. And then, all of a sudden, my bio dad turns around and says to her you know, I want to put it behind us and move forward. And then, um, but I want you to know, I really didn't make an effort. And then our birthday comes around and no phone call or nothing, and she just kept checking the phone and checking my phone and you know, did he message?
Speaker 2:did he message? Did he message? And I'm not gonna lie to her, no, and she's like why would he do that? Why would he play these games? With me, and now he's doing no contact. You know the silent treatment, which is a major trait that a narcissist does. The silent treatment is right up that flagpole of one of the tricks they pull out of their hat, so to speak.
Speaker 1:Does that make you as we'll say?
Speaker 2:the victim at the time?
Speaker 1:does that make you, as we'll say, the victim at the time? Does that make you or the recipient of his silence think? That hey, I'm guilty, I've done something. What have I done wrong? I need to pay, I need to come back to his good side, shit like that.
Speaker 2:I did that my whole life. I would be in a different state geographically and something would happen and I would get blamed for it and I would just go to a parliament and follow the sword, metaphorically and just be like you know, whatever it is, I'm sorry you did it, I'll cover you know, whatever the case is, and you do that to get them talking to you again, and it's just part of their cycle and the silent treatment you know, and then, you hear it Well, you're an adult.
Speaker 2:You're an adult, I'm still your kid. I'm still your kid, I might be an adult but I'm your kid. You know, and I hate when people say why did you stop talking? To your elderly parents. Why did you stop talking? To your elderly parents Right.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:So why don't you turn around for just a millisecond? And ask what could they have possibly done to make us stop talking to them Right, Turn it around and look at it Like what could they have done?
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:What you know. These are the people that are supposed to teach you what is right and wrong? They're supposed to teach you what is acceptable as a partner, as a person, and you know what do and don't do in life. And maybe that's when you have the realization of what really is and isn't, and instead it's all what you've done after all they do for you and that's their little flying monkeys that run around talk bad about you and slam you and slander you and you know, it's like when I wrote my.
Speaker 2:I've been on again, off again. No contact with my biological family for years and it's. I wrote a book and they haven't read it. They refuse to read it right. And it was just people asked me in the the who take first, how was I about them? And I was very what's the term I'm looking for?
Speaker 2:Subtle about who they are and who picked first, because it wasn't about them it was about me surviving abuse, and I literally did not put in there 99% of what transpired between us, because that's not what it was about. Right right and I've always thanked them because they did give me refuge. They did allow me and faith to move in after she was born. She was over six months old when they offered, but we paid the price. Believe me, we paid to be there and I will forever thank them for what they did, because that's the right thing to do and I am thankful because we were minutes from hospital at that point.
Speaker 2:But then again, you know, whenever they would get to, who and how they were, I would get in front and not allow them to do that to to my daughter, because my daughter needed full-time care. She could not be taken care of um by anyone unless it was absolutely around the clock and I I did not go into any of the narcissism and who kicked first, but then as time went on on and I learned more and more about things.
Speaker 2:I also saw really firsthand, because now I'm a mom, and I saw how they were to my daughter in regards to you know, nothing was ever good enough. Or if my daughter would ask my mom to do something with her, she didn't have the time but she would drive an hour to go see my brother to take him a pad of paper, literally like.
Speaker 2:That's not an exaggeration, that's literal, and my bio dad used us as an excuse for his extracurricular activities, and it was told to me on numerous occasions that if I ever opened my mouth and told his wife, my mother, that he would make her believe that I made him have this relationship right.
Speaker 1:No a narcissist would do that, would they?
Speaker 2:And it's like how can I make you put your tongue in her mouth? How can I make you do other things right? And there was so much going on and it was constant and it just I couldn't believe it.
Speaker 2:I took my daughter on a uh mother-daughter trip before she had a major surgery and he wanted to go and I would never let him drive. I drove, and so, long story short, I'm not going to give all the details because you have to see nart nart who's there and NartNart who's there is not a. He said. She said it is.
Speaker 1:I don't even know how you explain it.
Speaker 2:There are pictures, emails, text messages. It's overwhelming in evidence. There's more evidence than there is anything. But I've redacted pictures, names, things of that nature.
Speaker 2:But so we're on this definitely a good read thank you, we're on this little weekend whatever and knock, knock, knock on the door the next day after we arrive and open it up and there is somebody with their two year old toddler, who happens to be younger than me, and my daughter, who is a. How do you explain? She is a firecracker. Yes, she's a firecracker. She sat there. She sat there and started taking pictures of them canoodling with each other and there's pictures of them kissing. She took pictures right and then she had asked him to go to a movie with her.
Speaker 1:She really wanted to go see a movie in the movie theater.
Speaker 2:He said, no, I don't like those movies whatever whatever well after you know, we went and did our own thing. I wasn't babysitting you know they tried to put that child off on us and it was after dinner that first night we got a knock on the door and the kid literally just dropped off and ran and they went out and they went to a movie and I texted him and he stayed and he was in the movie with her right, he stated how much he liked her and then he wrote me back after midnight saying come open the the room door, you know and this just went on and on
Speaker 2:and I said this kid won't stop crying. I can't get this kid to stop. And he was like, well, there's a big empty bed down here. You know this was after their date or whatever but these are things that are done by narcissists. But then they can never, ever, ever, ever, ever hold accountability, ever they cannot do it.
Speaker 2:You know I mean and it's mind blowing, and most people are afraid of my biological father, which for most of my life I understood he was in. I want to say this without giving anything away he was someone in power. He he had a lot of power and he is someone who has the mentality that someone who is from New York and Jewish is about power and money and he portrayed that every which way he could Like. It was all about that.
Speaker 1:Like if you came around it was.
Speaker 2:Let me show you my new toy. Let me show you my new this Let me show you my new that this is how much it's worth. This is every I mean. Is that not true? Like you know you would come over and it would be like oh, let me show you my new whatever.
Speaker 1:And it's not let me show you my $24 toy it's.
Speaker 2:Let me show you my $80,000 vehicle or whatever you know, and, and for the longest time like the will was held over my head. You know you're not going to get anything if you don't do this and you don't do that, and it's not about the monetary.
Speaker 2:I wanted the items that belong to my grandparents because, that's what meant the world to me is my grandparents and I would keep their belongings in the family forever, like I would pass it on down to faith. It's not about monetary at all, and the will was held over me for the longest time and I totally fell in love with my husband all over again when he told him what did you say?
Speaker 1:to him.
Speaker 2:About what you want.
Speaker 1:No, I was going to present him with a prenup and say the only thing I want from you is your daughter, right? I don't give a shit about anything, that you have your $80,000 Corvette, your $1.5 million home. I don't care about any of that. Just give me. I'm going to take your daughter and I'm going to take your granddaughter. That's it. That's all I want, and I mean that. And we had the happiest marriage, y'all.
Speaker 2:This is my third wife.
Speaker 1:I messed up, you know, first, two times. I should have married this one back when I met her 25 years ago. But you know, hey, that's the way I am. I'm hard-headed, I got to learn the hard way, like most of us guys. But this is my soulmate and I'm going to fight to keep her. I should have fought to get her.
Speaker 2:Oh, you had me, you had me.
Speaker 1:But regardless. I'm here, I'm her husband and that's my daughter there. My wife allowed me to adopt her.
Speaker 2:I did and you cried during the adoption.
Speaker 1:If you stepfathers have the chance to adopt your younglings. I'd say do it Because it is the best thing for you and them.
Speaker 2:Let me tell you one thing that I can tell you, if you are a survivor of narcissism in any way, let me tell you so my bio father says to my husband one day, out of nowhere, they ran into each other and
Speaker 2:we had been in no contact at this point for years. And he sees my husband and he talks to him like 45 minutes and then I hear about all this and then we ended up having a conversation and he actually said to me and my husband heard this, so he'll speak up here he actually I offered for him to come on the show and he agreed, hesitantly, agreed and he said to me I don't know what we would talk about and I was like well, how about we talk about?
Speaker 2:what it's like to have your child go through domestic violence, right, and he was like, well, I don't have anything to say about that. And he said you need to have your mom on. So I asked her you know, do you want to come on the show? And she was like you won't like what I have to say because I would say you chose to stay, so you stayed, so you get what you get. But after speaking with him over and over again, we were having a conversation, my husband was sitting there and I said you know you really should come on and he's like, well, why don't we talk about?
Speaker 2:he wanted to talk about where he had all this power from professionally and it wasn't advantageous for what we do pretty much, and so I said no, why don't you come on and talk about and he which is so weird, because anybody who knows him knows that nobody puts him in a corner, like people fear him.
Speaker 2:And I was like no, I really want you to come on the show. I really want you to come on the show. He agreed to it and he even signed a waiver stating that he would in fact come on the show. Stating that he would in fact come on the show. And so what? My husband is like standing up trying to swat a fly, distracting me, but he's not gonna. Hey, did you get it? Because you just probably pulled out people leaders. Um, he said he was gonna come on and he signed the waiver. And then he says, well, I'm not coming on until we have a conversation about what you did.
Speaker 2:And that's again trying to play slay mommy for his creative activities if you want to say but it's the same thing, like on. You know both sides. Like his mom, michael's mom, she reached out. Well, she actually went to her brother his brother to reach out to have us try and talk with her and when she gets on the phone, no accountability for their actions. No, you know, I'm sorry um you know why, didn't you and my husband asked her why didn't you and my husband asked her why didn't you check on our?
Speaker 2:daughter your granddaughter, and I didn't know if you'd want to hear from us or hear from me and I mean, how do you answer that? What is your advice to? I don't remember. Well, I do kind of remember what you said, but like you know?
Speaker 1:You're asking me if I remember. Well, when she said to you I didn't know if you would want to hear from me when Faith was in the hospital all this time, yeah. I don't remember what I said.
Speaker 2:You weren't happy about it.
Speaker 1:No, I don't remember what I said, and that's been over a month, and she wanted to call the following week and then nothing again.
Speaker 2:But, it's just, it's mind-blowing, the genetic makeup and the mind of a narcissist. It really is, because anybody who's gone through it and understands they love the silent game, they love never taking accountability for their actions? They never will they always put it off on someone else, like his mom when I became an amputee? It's fine if you don't call and check on me, but you should have checked on your son and your granddaughter.
Speaker 2:Her answer was well, she had another hand. She could have called me with that one. I mean seriously, that's not even funny, that's not even remotely funny. And my husband and I are not innocent. We're not perfect people by any means, but we own up to what we do we hold ourselves accountable for our actions. So I mean have we made mistakes short, not to enjoy every single minute.
Speaker 1:You know, I can't tell you how we just laugh every single night. I mean, babe, every night before we all turn in for the night, I mean we are laughing so hard that our faces hurt because we're just laughing so hard and that's how it should be.
Speaker 2:I mean, if you've ever seen grumpy old men or grumpier old men.
Speaker 1:That is how my daughter and husband are.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's hilarious to hear the two of them. They are always at it, but I'll tell you what their bond is so thick and so real and they love each other so much. It makes my heart so happy and that's why I have said from inception, the only person I would ever let be her dad is michael, and you know they'll be like, oh, you putz back and forth, back and forth, but then she wants a daddy hug. You know she wants to sit down there for her daddy daughter movie night and they curl up on the couch.
Speaker 2:She puts her head on his shoulder and they watch horror movies and it's just the sweetest thing and those are the memories that you will have forever and ever not what your highest score was, not how long it took you to beat. Whatever game you're playing, it's about making memories with those that love you, accept you and cherish you unconditionally right babe.
Speaker 1:Yes, keep talking about the deposit, miss jay oh my gosh, my husband.
Speaker 2:By the way, I surprised my husband over the weekend and I will spell out the name, since there is one in the room a-l-e-x-a, you can ask her to play a contagious smile podcast and she does. We are now there. It is so exciting to know that we are now on that platform as well. That is incredibly exciting, and we have so much coming up in the future. Here Again, I want to apologize as my speech takes a turn.
Speaker 1:I've noticed it.
Speaker 2:So if I noticed it, I am sure others have noticed it as well. I am having this life changing surgery here in less than three weeks and it will affect my speech, but I have my ride or die here with me right babe.
Speaker 1:I thought, you were talking about the girl.
Speaker 2:Yes. I'm here and I will do my best and he will be my corrector, if you will.
Speaker 1:Oh Lord, I slept through English y'all.
Speaker 2:Did you say you slept with the teacher?
Speaker 1:Maybe, but no. In the janitor closet, that too, and no, I slept through English. My husband was a reformed.
Speaker 2:What I was a cop, what Not all cops a whore, what I was a cop, what Not all cops are whores.
Speaker 1:If there's a cop out there.
Speaker 2:Go ahead. I can't wait.
Speaker 1:I was never a whore that has not been outside of their marriage.
Speaker 2:I've never been outside of a marriage.
Speaker 1:I said out there, listen, please write to me and correct me. Let me know there's rainbows somewhere.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you'll write up it Apparently. You did it way too much. I'm dropping my common sense in the chair. Seriously, no, not all cops are whores. I don't believe that.
Speaker 1:All the ones I knew were no, they're not they were Not, not.
Speaker 2:And then I hear these stories. Oh my god, I'm not even going to tell any of these stories. I heard a story from my husband over the weekend that I only knew what I thought was the whole story. But I only knew like a quarter of the story, and so the quarter of the story I knew was enough stuff that was jumping your skin right now, that's right. Come here stucko. Come here now, that's right. Uh, come here stuff, oh, stuck. Oh, come here baby. That's mama's boy and daddy's wearing her, so that's probably why.
Speaker 2:But I knew a quarter of the story, the whole story rather and instead I only know a quarter of the story and it was not easy. So imagine beloved, your best friend, your spouse, all of a sudden correct what you thought was the entire story into holy shit. Are you kidding me While I'm driving right?
Speaker 1:Okay, let me stop right there.
Speaker 2:First of all, ladies, women, wives.
Speaker 1:If you honestly do not want to know, please don't ask.
Speaker 2:But when I asked, you only gave me a quarter of the story. I thought it was the whole story.
Speaker 1:Because, as Jack Nicholson said, you can't handle the truth, I can't handle the truth. You know I can Look how much you spazzed out.
Speaker 2:Striving when I realized that you were trying to be an Oreo cookie.
Speaker 1:Well, there you have it, folks.
Speaker 2:I mean seriously, there's no other way I can say, and out of total respect and love for my husband, I will not go into the thing that makes you go. Like you know, but women imagine your husband's body parts in or on around, close to near someone else. That's not you right. And then imagine them coming to see you right after. I'm just saying there's a visual. And then and then imagine them coming to see you right after I'm just saying there's a visual. And then imagine your sweet flower of life, your bride, the love of your life, not your roommate, not your other half, not the ball and chain, but your love, your best friend, the woman that you wake up to and say thank God, having fond location and that was on purpose of another man, another man kissing her forehead, holding her hand, moving the hair out of her face, and let's just see how they react. I'm just saying, like, imagine another man kissing my forehead babe no, why?
Speaker 1:because? Why?
Speaker 2:that's my area imagine another man kissing you. That's what I do.
Speaker 1:That is what you do. That is something between us.
Speaker 2:But see, I believe, and I've always believed, that kissing is such an intimate thing, Like it is such an intimate act between two people who care about each other. I don't think so. Why.
Speaker 1:Because you watch movies all the time. They kiss that's just acting. Okay, so they're whores.
Speaker 2:So what if somebody wanted to kiss me on the forehead? It's just an act.
Speaker 1:No. No that is something special.
Speaker 2:You hold hands with somebody that's an intent. You sticking your tongue in someone's mouth is not an intent, it's just a kiss. So if some guy wanted to reach up and play tonsil hockey with me, you wouldn't care.
Speaker 1:I would care more if he kissed you on your forehead and held your hand.
Speaker 2:But you wouldn't care if somebody came up and tonsil hockey with you.
Speaker 1:I would care more.
Speaker 2:So I can get out a name and say this person can come up and stick his tongue in my mouth and he'd be okay let's just say he'd get less of a woman, okay you know me, I have never in my life cheated on somebody I was in a relationship with, even when I should have.
Speaker 2:I couldn't, I couldn't do it. It's not in like, growing up I never wanted to make my grandparents unhappy or disappointed in me and I was raised with those old school things right. So like no, I couldn't imagine cheating. Now I will call a spade a spade because I own what I do.
Speaker 2:Don't get me wrong. If I was remotely dating someone back in the day and I was interested in someone else, I would break up with that person and then go out with the other person later on, maybe the same day, but I was done with one before I hung like, hung out with another, and I was a good girl who kept her legs crossed like I don't like forever.
Speaker 2:I never just gave it out, I just didn't believe in it, because that's something so intimate and personal. You don't just you know, you don't you tend to the garden. Like I don't just you know you don't you tend to the garden, I don't know, I'm just whatever.
Speaker 1:I don't know. Alrighty, this just got real Talk about wife's garden, so let me ask you are you nervous about this upcoming surgery?
Speaker 2:So my wife has an upcoming surgery Because of the abuse she went through.
Speaker 1:Because of the abuse actually ask you Are you nervous about this upcoming surgery? So my wife has an upcoming surgery because of the abuse she went through.
Speaker 2:Because of the abuse. Actually, I have one this Friday.
Speaker 1:She would literally wake up to that SOB pounding on her head.
Speaker 2:Straddling me as he straddled her.
Speaker 1:Beating her with his fists.
Speaker 2:Saying wake up, bitch.
Speaker 1:Give me something to drink. I'm thirsty Because of all that she has lost her hearing. She's almost completely deaf in her left ear and she is 100% deaf in her right ear, so we have to have surgery to correct some of the issues that we're having later on.
Speaker 2:Now we've done a lot of surgery to try to correct it. My jaws are replaced the right I've had my eardrum completely rebuilt and it fell apart like swiss cheese and my husband's gonna make steamboat willie reference. And then it fell down like it's not upright, like it's supposed to, and I've had to do all these surgeries and, in all reality, like a lot of surgeries that I've needed have had to go on the back burner, because I've always waited until Faith was stable.
Speaker 2:If she wasn't everything I had to go through, waited because she's number one.
Speaker 1:That's great. I want your tea, yes. So we're waiting excitingly for a response back from none other than the team from James Patterson for my wife.
Speaker 2:We got an email.
Speaker 1:We don't know if it's legit. We don't know if it's real. We're hoping, because my wife has done a lot of celebrity interviews.
Speaker 2:Scott Hamilton especially coming back.
Speaker 1:Been through James Patterson's masterclass. It's a possibility, y'all. I thought you were going to say.
Speaker 2:James Theder.
Speaker 1:Oh, yes, Blacklist. We've had Aram, which is Amir. Come on the show and reach out.
Speaker 2:I have to say this Because anybody who watches the Blacklist okay, number one, that is a show that's probably one of the best shows ever made ever, and james spader should get every single freaking war possible for this show. But you watch the show and, yes, some people might not be able to watch it because it could be a little graphic and gory to people who aren't into this kind of show. But the premise of the show is he is on the fbi's most wanted list, right, and you watch this and he's brilliant. And the more you watch the show, the more you're like I need a Raymond Reddington. I need a Raymond Reddington.
Speaker 2:There should be a Raymond Reddington for people who go through domestic violence, because this man and his character is just like you are my Raymond Reddington, babe, because he comes in in his fedora and he he never hurt people like all he does is kill people. He's never killed a good person. He only hurts people who deserve to be killed because they hurt other people. So, right, and you watch these episodes of him and he's just so like, it's his personality, disposition that make his character come to life. And if I could interview him, johnny depp, keanu reeves, I'd be, I'd be good.
Speaker 2:I'm just saying, like it's the fact that this is a man who literally only went after bad people and he's made out to be this monster. There's some twists and turns and there's some stuff in it that's like, yeah, whatever, but the overall premise of Reign of. Reddington is a must.
Speaker 1:So keep your fingers crossed. Hopefully we can get something going on with James Patterson. My wife emulates him a lot.
Speaker 2:He's a fabulous writer. He doesn't write on a computer. He writes with pencil and like legal pad, which is amazing and a lot of people don't know that.
Speaker 1:You have hundreds of them, I do.
Speaker 2:I have one in my bag. You have one on the bed. I have one next to the bed. I have one in the shower.
Speaker 1:There's not one in the shower.
Speaker 2:But if I can make it work, I would, but like it was so weird when I was watching his master class and participating in it, Because he'd be like I'll be at dinner and I'll take the napkin and do the drink and I'll start writing on it, and those are how a lot of my books come to life and I'm like I'm the same freaking woman Right right it's amazing, it's amazing.
Speaker 2:I just don't have the team he does that takes all of his napkins and paper and puts it to a document and you know that you do it all yourself I do, I do do that all myself and just say do, do, I do, do all, whatever you're talking about up with like a like oh, that was a an ear blip. Or my like, when I have a speech thing want to say no, you can say do do, I know. But I'm just saying, in the future, you know, I gotta be able to be like. That was one of those, you know right things, but you didn't answer the question and before we end this podcast question are you worried about this ear?
Speaker 1:surgery. No, I am not worried about this ear surgery. No, I am not worried about this ear conversation, so thank you for listening to what.
Speaker 2:I have to say this is the very first time ever and all my hundred plus surgeries my husband is taking off work to go with me to pre-op. I worry if you're worried.
Speaker 1:That's the only time. Other than that, I have to stay strong for our family, and I'll be sick.
Speaker 2:Well, that may be true because I have to drive home. No, your daughter gets a crown and you take the furnace off the floor Like, literally, you will just pace the floor back and forth and I look back and I go, is that how? I was back in the beginning. Holy shit, really yes, because anytime we leave the door open, because it gets hot in the room and anybody walks by Holy shit, really yes, because anytime we leave the door open because it gets hot in the room and anybody walks by, he's like every time somebody walks by it's been four minutes 18 seconds.
Speaker 2:I haven't heard anything. I need an update and I'm like damn, I didn't used to be like that, that's exactly how I used to be Holy crap.
Speaker 1:Are you complaining?
Speaker 2:No, but it's sweet. I mean, I'm sorry, it would be a little nice for you to be a little like that, just maybe 25% like that for me.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to show you I'm worried and have you worry more. It won't. It'll make me feel better. It'll make you feel better. It'll show that I'm concerned, okay. During my invitation, you made jokes about ever naming Hap off Right as soon as I came out. Right, that's how we are Right. But you know you could have shed a little, a little, did I not shed tears with you? No, before we did all this, you could not stand up.
Speaker 2:Are you kidding me, Babe? Well, you kept standing up and you're like I can't. I got to go sit down. I'm so tired, I got to go sit down. I standing up and you're like I can't, I gotta go sit down, I'm so tired, I gotta go sit down, I'm so tired. And like babe they're wheeling me back in five minutes. Go ahead. It's more masculine to see the caring side than withholding.
Speaker 1:Let it be noted, audience, that I do have a medical condition.
Speaker 2:No, no, I know you care, I know you care, I know you care and you love me unlike I've ever been loved before, and that's what I cherish about you. So much is because normally I am a wreck going into surgery out of fear of how faith is doing while I'm in there, and she used to have a doctor sit with her. Her grandmother was a doctor.
Speaker 2:I would still be worried. She had a doctor who was one of her treating neonatologists. I would still be worried back in the day. Now, with you, who is not a doctor, I was more at ease.
Speaker 1:Thank you, doctor. You're welcome doctor.
Speaker 2:You're welcome. Doctor, Not doctor. Not doctor, doctor, not doctor.
Speaker 1:Yeah, your three doctors take it up.
Speaker 2:Whatever?
Speaker 1:Whatever. So be mindful this weekend we may or may not do a podcast, absolutely will. Depending on how my wife is recovering, because I'll make her ass sit in bed. No, yes.
Speaker 2:I do. No, I have a procedure Friday morning and then I have a doctor's appointment four hours later, so we will be going from one to the other 48 hours. We will be podcasting. We did podcasting for pause 24 hours after a massive surgery and I sat there for three days straight. We will podcast.
Speaker 1:Our listeners want to hear us.
Speaker 2:They want to hear you. No, they want to hear you because everybody says my husband tells everybody I'm no good at podcasting. He says it's Eeyore, every single person who has written it. I'm the ass. Eeyore's not an ass, he's so cute. Eeyore's an ass. No, he's ass. Eeyore's not an ass, he's so cute. Eeyore's an ass he's not, he is, he's a donkey, he is the cutest thing. Anyway, everybody says he's funny, everybody says how funny my husband is.
Speaker 2:Eeyore's depressing you sit there and you gotta give yourself credit. We would not be globally ranked podcast if it wasn't for the both of us. It's our chemistry. Everybody loves our chemistry because we're fun, we're funny, we're hosted, we're real. It's true. No, no, no.
Speaker 1:Y'all type in my name.
Speaker 2:How many pages do I?
Speaker 1:take up.
Speaker 2:I can page that real. Let's type in Victoria Curie.
Speaker 1:Y'all type in her name, victoria Curie, on Google or Bing. How many pages is it? Nothing but her, would you like?
Speaker 2:to start getting that line right IMBD Cameo.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's right, Michael's not in there.
Speaker 2:Would you like to be?
Speaker 1:Michael. Jordan might be Would you like to be.
Speaker 2:Here is not Victoria Curie is on IMBD Would you like to start getting more line right and get more? Why? Because I'm starting, not Victoria Curie is on IMBD Getting more lightweight and getting more.
Speaker 1:Why? Because I'm starting an engraving business downstairs right below us and that's taking up a lot of my time.
Speaker 2:But you're not going to come away from a contagious smile. No.
Speaker 1:So why don't you? Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:We need a good name for an engraving business. I like the one I did.
Speaker 1:Well, what'd you do with it? I?
Speaker 2:don't rightly know, sir, I don't rightly know. Oh, it is right here.
Speaker 1:If y'all can think of a good name, that kind of flows with a contagious smile. What we are, who we're about.
Speaker 2:Maxina Smiles Engraving.
Speaker 1:Maybe y'all can help us out.
Speaker 2:Hey, I came up with Junk and Disorderly.
Speaker 1:That's ours, that's right, that was awesome that's trademark and LLC More healthy. Anyway, thank you all for listening to A Contagious Smile, unstoppable with Victoria Curie Published author of 41, soon to be 42 books.
Speaker 2:Doctorate times three oh God.
Speaker 1:Lover of animals.
Speaker 2:I love you. I know we need to start puppies again. I want a little puppy, I need a little stuccoette, y'all keep her in your prayers and thoughts as she goes through this massive surgery this coming Friday. This one isn't a big one. This one I'm doing in the office. It's later in september, whatever. Yeah, I need a little puppy. Thank y'all. Hey, babe, we need to talk about this. I need a puppy talking about it off air I need a puppy.
