A Contagious Smile Podcast
A Contagious Smile is a powerful platform dedicated to uplifting and empowering special needs families and survivors of domestic violence. Through heartfelt stories, we shine a light on the journeys of extraordinary individuals who have overcome unimaginable challenges. Their triumphs serve as a testament to resilience and strength, inspiring others to rediscover their own inner light. Each episode features candid interviews with survivors, advocates, and experts who provide valuable resources and insights to support those on their own paths to healing and empowerment. Join us as we celebrate the power of resilience, the beauty of shared stories, and the unstoppable spirit of those who turn adversity into hope. Let us guide you in rekindling your spirit, because every smile tells a story of courage and transformation.
A Contagious Smile Podcast
One Arm, One Ear, All Heart: Navigating Life's Challenges
Good evening and welcome back to another episode of Contagious Smile. Unstoppable, I have me very sexy. Hold on, let me read your shirt. I asked God to make me a better man, and he sent me my wife.
Speaker 2:Oh, sweet cheeks.
Speaker 1:That's adorable, Hi, babe Howdy y'all. You have your own at your desk.
Speaker 2:For some reason my microphone is not working y'all. Is it plugged in? It's plugged in. Is it turned on? Was that a sexuating window? Maybe Will you stop talking in your 900 voice I'm not using my 900. Yes, you are, hey.
Speaker 1:Hi this is Victoria.
Speaker 2:Do not butter your biscuits.
Speaker 1:Oh, you're nasty Name, stinking. So we've been so crazy, crazy busy.
Speaker 2:No, you have been busy. I have been procrastinating.
Speaker 1:All right, that's a shout out to Joshua.
Speaker 2:Josh, I got you buddy man, he's going to have to listen to this one.
Speaker 1:He does listen to them. He has a new podcast called.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:That's a Fact. That's a fact and it's really good.
Speaker 2:Not to be confused with all the other. Oh, that's a Fact On YouTube that I saw.
Speaker 1:Anyway, fantastic, wonderful, wonderful, just like he is, so we have I have been very busy um, I'm happy to say, after so much frustration. Dear silence you lost is silence you lost is done, Ta-da 99.9%. Why are you not busted? Tell us why I'm from the 80s.
Speaker 2:No, you're not, you're 70s 70s, grew up in the 80s.
Speaker 1:Later, so of uploading it and they're like you are .00000, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero. One millimeter off to the left inside gutter top. Whatever is stupid crazy and I was working on it till like 2 30 in the morning and then all day today and finally, I was like that's it, I need a break and so frustrating, so now I got the manuscript in and done and now I have to fix the cover Because it's like by my math it's like 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 Decimal points, backsided crooked letter, I, t, whatever.
Speaker 1:So I gotta fix that. But it looks great, don't you think, babe?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so when this book launches, y'all please Pick up a copy of it and share with somebody, because it is. It's eye-opening, it's heartwarming to know that you know folks got out of these bad situations. Awful, they're horrible really. And these are not made-up stories. Anybody who knows, anybody who's been in this, will read this and know that it's all true, it's all fact. My wife's going to test she has to read all of them. Oh yeah, I only read some of them, yeah, and I believe there's some we can read on air.
Speaker 1:We can and it's going to coincide with there's a deer silence master class. There is a deer silence survivor kit course. There is also a deer silence course in there for body dysphoria, which is very common in individuals who've been in any kind of an abusive situation, relationship or any kind. I still have body dys disorder to this day and I am the first to admit it. My husband, I'll tell you that I don't see myself the way he sees me, that's for sure. I just see not the happy I see the scars.
Speaker 1:And then you know the removal of critical parts, and I always joke that I'm like the ha, the Halloween pumpkin that's just carved out and everything's been taken out from it.
Speaker 2:So, speaking of removal parts, y'all keep Victoria in your prayers.
Speaker 1:No, my husband and daughter, keep them in your prayers. Don't listen to her. I'm the boss, I'm the president. Here we go with that bull crap again.
Speaker 2:Keep her in your prayers. I thought this coming Friday she's going to have another major surgery and she will be 100% in death, Profound Because of the surgery Well, not because of the surgery.
Speaker 1:It's intentional, but because of the asshole who broke my jaw so many times and shattered my eardrum.
Speaker 1:And the specialist rebuilt it and it didn't work and all the surgeries later and da-da-da-da-da, and my ear is going to be like a. My eardrum and specialist rebuilt it. It didn't work and all the surgeries later and my ear is going to be like a man's though it's on the wall to look at and it, you know, really has no purpose except for exterior reasons only. So our daughter faith is like you should just, once it's all healed, get like 25 tattoo earrings or whatever your ear and I'm sure my husband will be all excited about. We have to be 25 earrings this year. Whatever can't wear a hearing aid. They said I need a cochlear implant, but what the hell is wrong with our insurance company's 300 000 denial? You know they won't do it, so uh. They also said I was the candidate for a cochlear for.
Speaker 2:Both ears.
Speaker 1:So that's over half a million dollars and insurance says no, thank you, so I'll be just back on my one chronically whatever hearing aid in one side. But I wanted to touch on that for a second because we went out to help a wonderful couple this evening and after our boards our daughter is like I need to get something to eat quick, and so we stop in to grab a little snack and just kidding around, I put a napkin in my husband's ear, not like down in the canal but like just in the outer you know part of his ear and like he just totally, disposition changed dramatically what was that like for you like?
Speaker 2:well, I'm just like uh, you know anybody who loses here it throws off your perception.
Speaker 2:it throws off you know just the the, the echo, the balance of room, okay, or wherever you're at, it just throws it off and you're hearing things and you know it's just weird. So when my wife got her left arm amputated, I spent a whole day wrapped up in a sling to where I could not use my left arm, and I did that for a whole day and it was so bad for you. It was extremely frustrating because I put on my bridges and.
Speaker 1:I got to stay to help, you got them you know, I got to do that.
Speaker 2:I, you know, I put on my clothes and then I didn't then. I did everything that day, uh, until I think, in the shower. You couldn't shower, you did quick. So we went out to eat for dinner. We went to Longhorns, I believe yes but you were so cute.
Speaker 1:You're like I can't cut my steak or, no, your chicken. You're like I can't cut it and you're like, how am I going to do this? And then you know little things you don't think about. You're like how am I going to hold that and do that?
Speaker 2:So I wanted to spend a day in my wife's life, and then I walked in her shoes, so to speak. And so that's what I'm going to do again after my wife's surgery, when she completely loses all hearing in her right ear, I'm going to do the same thing. I'm going to wrap it up, tape it up the best I can, and I'm going to experience what she's going through so that I can understand. I know it's frustrating, you know, but I haven't walked in her shoes, you know. Until I do, then I can sympathize and empathize.
Speaker 1:But I don't ask for your sympathy.
Speaker 2:No, you don't. You don't ask for anyone's sympathy. You're a strong woman.
Speaker 1:We went to the gun range last night and we had our ammo and there was boxes and boxes. And one of these gentlemen was like hey, you want me to carry that for you? And I'm like why? And I just scoop it up, nub, and I carry it to the car. And it was like, don't feel bad for me. And it's like you know, before we left I was like wait, babe, I gotta tie my sneakers. And he comes in there and I was finished and he was like how the shit do you tie your shoe one-handed?
Speaker 1:You know, but it's like there are things that I cannot do that drive me that crazy. I mean seriously, because I mean there's just, you know, some people are like how do you shave, or how do you, you know, do you like cooking is real pain, because how do you do like cooking is real pain because how do you hold the pot to stir it so it doesn't slide all over the stove.
Speaker 2:you know, I've been seeing this little blonde lady with absolutely no arms taking care of her little girl and she does everything with her feet. She puts on the child's clothes, her socks, you know, takes things off the shelf and it everything with her feet. She puts on the child's clothes, her socks, takes things off the shelf. It's amazing what y'all can do out of necessity. I'm very proud of my wife y'all. If you have a chance to experience some of what they're going through, I suggest you do it so that you can understand. It's not easy, it's frustrating. Give them time, have patience with them. You know, don't get angry, don't get mad and throw up your hand. Oh woman, I got to do everything for you now.
Speaker 2:No, Son, you need to get out of the situation. Oh yeah, you'll be like that.
Speaker 1:You need a good husband yeah, it's ironic because it's like there's certain things that you can't do, and I always joke that I need like a usb port strip to like plug everything up and in every day just to get up before I even hit the floor. Um, all the amputees that I've had the privilege of speaking with and counseling with has all told me from the jump that they'd rather lose both their legs than one of their arms, and I can understand how they could say that.
Speaker 1:I could totally understand, and you know we've actually also, um and I was very lucky that my husband with us, we'd actually spoken to, uh, my team that there's a possibility of like, how do you explain it?
Speaker 2:like a further, amputation like a a revision where they're possibly going to take more um off of it, but here's what.
Speaker 1:So I think is most people to be like oh, that's going to make me look worse, or whatever. I have never stated that I was not different. I will say that I have always said I am NOT the norm, because my very first thought when I found that I was getting every day was I don't lose my husband. That was a very first thought I had was oh my god.
Speaker 2:Michael's gonna leave me, and that's not true. I is it. I just thought I'd write anything back Snucko.
Speaker 1:No, don't you blame my baby doll. He just stopped over the headphone. No, but you know, as a woman, you go through this and you worry. You worry about like tomorrow, believe it or not. I can't believe it. Tomorrow is my three-year anniversary of my invitation.
Speaker 2:Wow.
Speaker 1:Three years Can you believe it? It seems like it was like a month ago.
Speaker 2:It doesn't feel like three years at all.
Speaker 1:And so to learn the irony of having to lose something else on the same flipping week, learn the irony of having to lose something else on the same flippin' week is, you know, it's like this is the week of me. I lose my nub, I'm gonna lose my hearing. It's like the week of removal and it I would just like to like. I watch these people do the TikTok videos because I hate scrolling and you know they fight anesthesia. And I would love like to like I watch these people do the TikTok videos because I hate scrolling and you know they fight anesthesia. And I would love for someone to record me fighting it, because they're all like okay, if you're red you get more. That's a proven fact, right? And then if you don't have pain tolerance, you have to have more. Well, I don't like having any anesthetic at all. I don't even like I don't take the Bursette. My husband will tell you I've never taken a single pain medication afterwards. I don't get the script, I don't fill them up, nothing.
Speaker 1:But when they're back there and they're like, okay, move over to the OR table and then we're going to strap you in and we're going to do this and this and this, and they're like, okay, you know the few times that I'm like, yeah, fine, I have no choice and we have to put the effort in general I fight it and they're like you're gonna be asleep in like 10, 9 and I'm still carrying on the conversation and I'm thanking the staff, thank you for taking care of me.
Speaker 1:You know, please make sure you give me back to my family and I, I literally, and they're just like looking and they kind of laugh because I'm like have you given it to me, yet they're like any second.
Speaker 1:And then if I, especially if I have a new anesthetic, or anesthesiologist come in or a fellow come in and they haven't worked with me before and they're just like why isn't she sleeping? Because they did that once. And they're like why is it? Why is she still awake? Why is she still? And they're like she's fighting it and I're like we give her propofol.
Speaker 2:We give her Benadryl.
Speaker 1:You know we give her Lanocaine, we give her. You know we started the Fentanyl, whatever it was. You know the whole like buffet you will and I'm just like so how are the kids? You know, how's the baby Since? You know, last time my surgery you just delivered and you know we're talking about me and I'm just, you know, literally, and they're like dude man. She says to be out and no, I'm, I'm here, I hate it, I don't, I don't want to be under anesthetic.
Speaker 1:It's not something that I like I, and you know I wanted them to record me. I think it'd be fun to to record me, but I think it would be not advantageous for them in future ORs. Cause they're going to be like what are they going to have to do to put me to sleep, Holy crap? Cause you show them pushing the propofol in the videos. Right, they're like pushing it, pushing it, and by the time I mean they're seeing some of them are seeing like Spice Girls or whatever you know.
Speaker 2:And then they're like yeah, I'm out, I I just think it'd be great.
Speaker 1:They're like what music do you want to hear? What do you want to listen to? You know, just talking shooting the breeze and I'm just like, okay, anything else, whatever, okay, no, all right, you know, I think I'm gonna mess with them this time. I just like, totally like, lay there and then just all of a sudden pretend, and then go out.
Speaker 2:That would be something I would do, yeah.
Speaker 1:Now I wonder, why do they make you become completely naked under your gown for surgery? Like no underwear or nothing, right. And if you're doing something like okay, my ear, why can't I wear some underpants up in that soar? Okay, I want to know. And they're like no, you can't wear any of it.
Speaker 1:Well, I understand. If there's metal, well then you can't operate on me because I'm all metal, so that's not gonna work, you know. But I really thought about what if I? Just to see what if I got those? My husband has not heard this and this is just completely. We're unscripted all the time. Okay, what if I got those? My husband has not heard this, and this is just completely we're unscripted all the time.
Speaker 1:What if I went and got like Google eyes and put them on my boobs Like Google eyes, nipple pasties Just to see, because you know you're going to hear about it If they pull my gown down and somebody's going to be like, excuse me, how?
Speaker 2:dare you Okay.
Speaker 1:Done to be like excuse me, oh, how dare you okay done. You don't have a family, you're involved. I miss some allergic adhesive. So how do we do? We have to come up with something, so we have to do something, figure it out, and then they're going to come up with this, and I'm sorry, but there's some googly eye crap going on up in here, so I can figure a way to do it without using the adhesive.
Speaker 1:I'll do it, I will. I'll do it there. I will too. Like if I could go in there eating, I would have eaten a gingerbread, you know what, what?
Speaker 2:I would like to change subjects now. Why?
Speaker 1:because we're talking about my wife on the air well, you wonder what they do in the OR while you're out.
Speaker 2:I don't want to wonder what they do, because then I might come in there.
Speaker 1:Just saying that's a way to find out, don't you think? I mean, one woman was brilliant. She somehow got a recorder in her wig and she left it in there and recording, so she knew everything that was going on. She's suing up millions because they were talking bad about her. You know like oh, maybe we call in a liposuction doctor while we're in here and give her a little mommy makeover.
Speaker 1:She was a larger woman and they think that because you're unconscious, they don't know. And when they got done, I mean you have a brunch lady cap on or whatever, and then she played the whole thing and she was living and so she soon would. I mean, what kind of home do they have? They can't deny it. You know she has the right to say I protect myself, or whatever. In the state. You only have to have one person agree to.
Speaker 1:In this state Right, but if I remember correctly, it was an orthopedic surgery. It was like on her foot or something, so they wouldn't be working on her face. But still, I mean, you don't know what they're saying about you in there.
Speaker 2:You have no idea.
Speaker 1:I think that would kind of be both Okay. My husband would be sleeping through it. Seriously, what were you doing during my amputation surgery?
Speaker 2:I was preparing for the drive home, so you were sleeping.
Speaker 1:I was lying in space unattended, scared because mom's losing a limb. You slept. That's very self-examined. I was getting re-energized. I drove there. I drove there, yeah, but I drove back. You could have slept the whole way, and for people wondering, what does that mean? You drove back? I went home the same day. I refused admission. I wasn't going to stay overnight in the hospital, but you should stay awake with our child, not count the inside of your eyelids.
Speaker 1:Just saying, and I'm in this, like I have a medical condition, oh dear lord. Anyway, and Joshua, help me out. Yeah, okay, yeah right, he knows about our medical condition. Anyway. So we're in this like gotta clean the house, get the house all cleaned up and ready, and I want to thank my husband because he finally finished no, I take that he completed more of the painting of the kitchen. Um, there's still some untouched and two small cans.
Speaker 2:It's not relevant, that's right. Thank you, no, it's not relevant, it was, it's above the fridge.
Speaker 1:You can see it. What about the brush marks on the bottom under the eye? It's only taking me a year to get up to do it.
Speaker 2:Josh, if you listen to this.
Speaker 1:Seriously though.
Speaker 2:Y'all hop on Josh's podcast. Okay, that's a fact. Oh, that's a fact. Seriously, though, y'all hop on Josh's podcast. Okay, that's a fact.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh, that's a fact. Look him up. What's his last name? He has to use his last name so Are you the pseudonym A?
Speaker 2:what Say opioid, opioid? Why are you cackling? What's the secret to a good marriage? Why are you cackling.
Speaker 1:What's the secret to a good marriage? Uh, or what? Or I didn't say, or, or I'm the one who's going to start speaking, even worse than I do, because I hear things differently. What is an? Or Like what you row with O-I-L? That's oil. Yes, it is, it's oil, that's olive oil. How does Papa keep himself clean?
Speaker 2:Is this a dirty joke? Yeah, how does Papa keep himself clean? He dips himself in olive oil.
Speaker 1:Now you said it right, oil Oil.
Speaker 2:Oil, oil. No one's going to understand what the hell I'm talking about. Oil. I need some oil in my car.
Speaker 1:I can't do it now. Oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil, oil Oil. Oh my goodness. So what is the secret to a good marriage? Seriously, you just did it. I cackled.
Speaker 2:Yes, you're cackling laughter. Give me this for a minute, guys, listen. Now I have two bottles of vodka, ta-da-da. After this, I'm gonna put two peppers in it and you give me crap. I mistakenly did not scoop up this young lady here 25 years ago. Of course, I was already married at the time. I met my wife, which I did not know Because I was a police officer. I didn't know. Anyway, she has now given me the father right of our daughter and allowed me to adopt her, and that right there, because my own other two kids have disassociated themselves from me. That has brought me so much happiness and joy to have these two ladies in my life. And it's just. You know what I think? I think that after my daughter read my daughter read a poem tonight, you cried At dinner. I think there was some pollen because the doors couldn't.
Speaker 1:Season is over you cried it could I think there was some pollen because the doors Season is over. You cried.
Speaker 2:It could have been the seasoning from the fries. Yeah yeah, there was some pollen in the room after she read her poem. One of many guys, many. So what is the secret of our happiness, of our marriage? Love and laughter.
Speaker 1:Sounds like the Al Bundy.
Speaker 2:We wake up, we're smiling, we're happy, we say good morning. My daughter will say good morning slut or good morning abuelo, and then we'll go to bed'll sit bed, will lap is and pee ourselves and, not to get change clothes and, you know, drink apple juice and fart on each other. You know that's, that's men. You're happy, a family who farts together, stays together.
Speaker 1:Exactly Alexa, oh yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so there's your answer. Was that an answer? It's kind of an answer. I won't give the microphone back.
Speaker 1:Why You're on a roll.
Speaker 2:No, I've got fat rolls.
Speaker 1:I do too. There you go. So how do you change so much from the young lad that you were who had all these provisions for me, as we were involved for four and a half years to this?
Speaker 2:You become loyal.
Speaker 1:Did you say loyal, you become loyal. Did you say loyal, you become loyal.
Speaker 2:You said you become loyal, loyal, loyal. Am I saying it wrong?
Speaker 1:Loyal.
Speaker 2:Loyal, no, loyal, almost, oh my God.
Speaker 1:Seriously, though, you went from like when we dated. You're like if you cut your hair, we'll break up. If you get a tattoo, I'll dump you. If you gain weight, I will get rid of you. I will not stay with a woman like this little did, I know he was having like sampling from all over the world. But and what did I do? I became obsessed in the gym, like obsessed.
Speaker 1:Here's the funny thing, and this is on me no, that's not fun no, it is, because this is how much I was in love with this man. Not only did I have blinders on boy, did I ever but my hair is naturally curly right. My husband only likes straight hair, which I should have seen as a big note of ding ding.
Speaker 1:Here here's like you saw my ding ding we ain't talking about large vessels right now, we're talking about you serious. So for the whole four and a half years that we dated, he never saw my hair curly like I would go to the gym and go wash my hair and then I would go home to my apartment I live alone and I would cook him homemade dinner, straighten my hair, and he would call me and every single night he'd say are you gonna come see me?
Speaker 1:are you gonna come see me? And I would say I don't want you to get sick of me. And when you said I never could get sick of you, come see me. And even if you were working an extra job, you still wanted me with you and you had no idea that my poor hair was best friends with a flat and I straightened that crap and then like I would wear it in fun or whatever, so that if I was sweating in the gym it wouldn't get all.
Speaker 2:Whatever man like my hairdresser and I were best of friends because when I didn't have time, I'd go in there and say on my lunch hour, can you straighten it real quick?
Speaker 1:he's like, and she said to me the sex has to be phenomenal because you're just like, but in all honesty, my husband and I am looking at him. We have never. That is not stuff. We've never had an argument, crickets no, argue now.
Speaker 2:Sure, go ahead and finish. That's because I want to change.
Speaker 1:We've never had an argument where we scream and yell and disrespect each other. It's just not happening. Nope, all right, change the subject.
Speaker 2:So, going back to what you said, that something like that, that you didn't have any idea of my extracurricular activities, right being an ICE agent. But you fell head over heels, for me anyway, I did.
Speaker 1:I knew before you even opened that trap under your nose that you were in.
Speaker 2:Okay, so you have how many degrees in psychology I? You're in. Okay, so you have how many degrees in psychology, I don't know. Okay, how many doctors do you have in psychology? None, none, okay, but you have three doctors, whatever. Alright, listen. So I don't know what this is called, but it's not the Stockholm Syndrome. Okay, what is the Stockholm Syndrome? Okay, what?
Speaker 1:is the Stockholm Syndrome.
Speaker 2:The victim or the person being in prison or kidnapped by the kidnapper or the abuser, they follow along. Okay, you can mistreat a dog and that dog will still love you. Why is that similar to what happened to you? Why did you, why were you so madly head over heels for me?
Speaker 1:you were prior to my abusive ex and I had all my extra.
Speaker 2:I was a whore. You were prior to my abusive ex.
Speaker 1:Okay, and I had all my extra. I didn't know I was a whore. In all fairness, hold on, let's call it out. I did not know, okay.
Speaker 2:I was a cop and I had many side pieces, so to speak. But in all, fairness.
Speaker 1:Did I have any idea? You did not, Because the minute I found out, yes, I ended us.
Speaker 2:Did it.
Speaker 1:Are you asking if this is your fault?
Speaker 2:Did it get rid of the love in your?
Speaker 1:heart no.
Speaker 2:That's what I'm asking. Why didn't it?
Speaker 1:Because you were always my place, you were always my. I knew when I met you you were my, meant to be, you my one. I knew that and that was before my views of x. I knew, okay, and it doesn't make sense to say that you always made me feel safe, because you know, I had multiple black belts and I did all this martial arts and then I, I did you know, I was one big walking lie.
Speaker 1:I didn't know that you and you know what. When you told me about her, you did it so delicately, but I think that's another reason why I never stopped looking at you. People are going to be like what? I met her. That's how I found out about her. He had told me he cheated on me with his ex when she came in town, and that's how they got pregnant right and so he had told me it would never happen again, and I forgive him, and then like when his son came home, he brought his son right over to my apartment, so, like I saw, and like
Speaker 1:was involved with the cute little thing for a very long time and he used to run up to me. He knew my name and want me to pick him up and hold him and and snuggle him and change his pants or whatever. I mean, that's how long he knew me. And the thing is is, when I finally asked why was I not good enough? And you know, let's just put it out there we lost a baby, we lost our daughter.
Speaker 1:I was pregnant and I lost the baby and he said to me that he felt horrible for not telling me about the wife, but he needed to have me in his life and so he'd rather have lied to me and kept me in some capacity. That not at all, because he needed me. And he said it was such genuineness and his eyes were full of pain and sorrow for what he had done by lying to me that I knew I mean.
Speaker 1:And the thing is that over all this time, I heard him on the phone with her and he didn't talk to her like a spouse, he talked to her like a pain in the ass, you know, like it was just like what? What do you want? Why are you calling me? You know it was not. There was never an I love you or or anything. So I was, and you know, with that and then I'm sure I had blinders.
Speaker 2:I.
Speaker 1:I never thought you did anything wrong until I learned, but like you were everything and you know we were talking to somebody that was family for me today, actually on the zoom, and he even told my husband. He's like I heard all about you forever, right, and this was after the abuse.
Speaker 1:This was in that period of time where you know I didn't date anybody, I didn't want to be around anybody, whatever, but he, this guy, was like a brother to me and he was oh yeah, I know about him, you know finally good to meet you or whatever you know, and it's like when you know, you know, so I don't know.
Speaker 2:That really answered this question or yeah, I'm just curious about why you would still retain that love. Because true love never dies After you find out that this person is so horrible.
Speaker 1:But you weren't you never hit me? Okay, hold on, you never hit me. You were there for me when I needed you.
Speaker 2:Always Like you were my one call.
Speaker 1:When I were my call and I called you about the abuse and we met in one of our places and when you saw me you were bawling right. You came to the NICU and you met her. You waited for me to meet you until the NICU was closing down, because that's the only time I would ever leave, right right. So, and it was only the one time I came out of the hospital you came up there. You checked how secure he was there to make sure that we were as safe as possible. You went to court with me and sat by my side. When I went to court against him, you went to the bathroom with him. To this day I don't know what was said at that bathroom and it's like one of my eight wonders of the world that I really want to know. That was the one time I really wanted to be a man and just go in there to a urinal and hear what was happening.
Speaker 1:But when I before and my husband doesn't have the best memory and he always says that I have this photographic memory and I'll tell you what it's a horrible thing to have, because I will tell you this and I'm looking at him as he's saying there's no problem in the room. When we went into one of the court hearings and I literally had just went in the bathroom and threw up and I came back out, you said to me come with me for a minute and you took me out of there and you took me around to the back hallway and you said come here.
Speaker 1:And there was a couple of people who tried to come around to the back hallway and you said, come here. And there was a couple people who tried to come down to make sure I was okay. You said, no, I got this. Go give me a minute. And you were just to them. You were like, give me a minute, but with me you weren't. And you looked at me and you nobody could touch me physically at this point and where I was in my life, like you know my husband to this day is the only person who can touch my neck.
Speaker 1:He can't, he can't touch my throat right Anybody else, and that's you know we're going to fight, but and that's a trigger but you knew like nobody else could come near me and touch me unless it was faith.
Speaker 1:And you looked at me and you asked me if I was okay and I was shaking. I remember this like it was yesterday. I was shaking and you looked at me and you said all right, kid, you have to get it together. And you wiped my face with your hands. You put both hands on either side of my cheeks and you tilted my head down. You kissed me on the forehead and you said you got this and I'm right here with you. You're not alone, I'm here. And it was like I can't even begin to tell you what that was, because when you said that to me, it felt like all of the strength came from within and I was like, let's go. And then we went back in there and I held my head up and you're like don't you?
Speaker 1:dare give him that satisfaction and I went back and you had met him a few times and y'all hate each other like nuclear, hated each other and I went back in there and you sat beside me enough and close enough where I could feel you and every little bit you would just take your pinky and rub my hand and it was like I've got you, I, I'm right here, right here, and you stayed right there and when we were all leaving, you were right beside me and it was like nothing else mattered. And that's why I mean people make mistakes and see to me mistakes. Is timing right, like if you had killed somebody? That's not a mistake, right?
Speaker 1:And you never hit me you never belittled me, you never talked bad to me. You did have some crazy premonition about some bull crap. Yeah, that was totally okay. Um, and now you knew that was a farce. But you were always there and to this day I'm so sentimental. It's ridiculous I have the pin that he wrote I love you for the first time on, I have the text message that he sent 20 years ago where, when he first saw Faith, he was like, oh my God, the world cannot handle a second one of you.
Speaker 1:And he said that little shit is so beautiful. You put the poop emoji and said brb, and I still have it. I still have that next and I have pictures of where I taught you in the police academy and I have pictures stuck up in the finest ass and I have a picture of your ass, I do. But it didn't mean, it didn't matter what my day was, what was going on in my corporate world, what was going on anywhere.
Speaker 2:When.
Speaker 1:I got around you I honestly was like melted butter, I was just done, it was done and it was just like. Even back then I didn't understand. Until I was with you, like nothing mattered to me, nothing, nothing outside while we were together for those four and a half years mattered to me as long as I had you.
Speaker 1:If I lost a job, which I didn't, but they come and go, friends come and go, apartments come and go, whatever, but as long as I had you, I didn't care, and that was the mentality and mindset that I had for that four and a half years.
Speaker 2:that was good, okay, then, no, that that that that was great definition of, you know, a happy marriage no, we weren't married by then? No, we weren't, but people, just heard roots. No, we weren't, but people just heard roots.
Speaker 1:You know Like it was. You know you think, oh, you're so giddy when you're in high school or whatever. And it's not the same Like when we started seeing each other again and you were living in a different state and you would fly up to see us, and I mean Faith and I and I would take you to the airport.
Speaker 1:I remember this one back here. I went in and I went to the bathroom and I dreaded it. I went in the bathroom. I'm looking at myself in the mirror and I'm like, just give me a sign that I'm not just that, that butter again. You know that it's real and you know that I've been through hell and she's been through hell and I won't let anyone close to faith and I had said from day one that faith would only be your daughter, like nobody else could be her kid. No one ever would be worthy.
Speaker 1:And I'm in the bathroom and I'm staring at the mirror and there's I'd already walked away you'd already gone through uh security and I was like give me some kind of sign, please, because I can't take the pain of losing you again with everything I've already been through that would have. Just you know I couldn't and we'd stay friends over the term of us not being quote-unquote together and I'm composing myself and I'm like, okay, I just need to walk out of here.
Speaker 1:And if it's meant to be, it will, and I walk out. And this is in the common area.
Speaker 1:This is like where you say goodbye to everybody and then they go through security and in Atlanta Atlanta is one of the worst airports in the world, and so, in order to come back where I was, you'd have to clear security again, come out as if you're going to baggage point and it's a big ordeal, right. So I come out of the bathroom and as I come out of the bathroom, I'm standing right there in front of me and no one else is around. No one in Atlanta Airport, which is impossible is you and I was like like what's wrong?
Speaker 1:and you were crying and you said I couldn't so everybody who wants to move to Georgia don't kiss me so I looked at you and said what's wrong?
Speaker 1:and you said I couldn't leave without kissing you one more time and I remember hugging you and I was like, thank you, thank you. I mean, you know you're not romantic, I'll be not. I wish, I think it should be a little bit more romantic, but that was just the sweetest thing. Like to me, his romance is he. He does once in a blue moon, hit, hit, leave cute little notes for me to find, and they're the sweetest things and they're hilarious, like over my desk it says I love you, don't work too much, I need you, and then over it tonight.
Speaker 1:I didn't want to add that.
Speaker 2:I need you tonight.
Speaker 1:That's what I said it says love my chicken, and then it says always here, always watching, always loving, always yours, always soulmate, soulmationship, baby. But then he'll like I had to go take, say, to a doctor's like that I get in my car and I'm putting, like my tea furnace in the cup holder and there's a little post-it note and it says I can't wait to have my chicken pot pie. And that's what anyone knows for the adults. And I was like oh, my God.
Speaker 1:That's him right, and that's what's amazing. It's just, sometimes I'm looking at him and he's like oh no, that's not a technical difficulty, is that?
Speaker 2:how I snore. That's a snore, yes.
Speaker 1:I have it recorded.
Speaker 2:I don't know if you're hocking up a loogie.
Speaker 1:I do have it recorded, but we can hear you downstairs and we can hear you all the way to the kitchen. But yeah, I look at him and I'm like it took me a long time to get you here, buddy.
Speaker 2:Well, that was a fun episode. I didn't know we were going there. Russ, they're here. Yeah, they're getting Nancy. I think they're getting Bob.
Speaker 1:They just want their mommy here. Make everybody laugh. Tell them what Stucco does if you get your mommy, it's so funny. Stucco is our golden retriever.
Speaker 2:My service dog, and Rusty is his son, his best service dog. They produced a lot of children here over the past three years Girl.
Speaker 1:But what happens if my husband comes anywhere near me? This fat heifer? Hey, watch your mouth, that's my boy. I'm not talking about you, I'm talking about the dog. You just called me fat.
Speaker 2:No, this fat heifer Stucco will push me away with his paws or his nose If I try to get near my wife to give her a hug or a kiss.
Speaker 1:But what's even better is if we're in bed all of a sudden Stucco becomes like air bud and goes flying in the air. From the bench in front of the bed Comes jumping in the air and just paws my husband right in the nuts.
Speaker 2:I know no one else has dogs like this right. Sleeping in bed with you, getting between you and your spouse.
Speaker 1:He's got my boy. Look he's doing it right now. Good boy Say hi everybody, I'm Pawfit. I bet he can say oil.
Speaker 2:Thank you to all the new members who have joined Mighty Networks, our academy. We've had a lot of members join last week.
Speaker 1:And. I've read 104 promo scholarship classes, that's awesome.
Speaker 1:Maybe, and the only way we continue to do that is if we continue to get donations from people like you, who either could donate $5, because these courses are valued at hundreds of dollars a piece. But I don't want someone who is evacuating an abusive situation to say do I feed my kids, do I take a course on survival? And of course you do both, and so we're never going to charge you for that, because healing shouldn't come with a price tag. But we do need people to help us keep, you know, paying for the expenses. I don't draw a paycheck.
Speaker 1:My husband doesn't draw a paycheck from from any of this, but you know we have to pay for the platforms and the electricity and I draft up and to create all of the content and I I don't get a dime for it. I know stucco is giving kisses to everybody. Stucco is the uh key person for stucco is the key person for Stucco Squad. He was just amazing because he's my boy, so handsome yes.
Speaker 2:And don't forget to go to Amazon for any of the books by Victoria Curie.
Speaker 1:And please jump on and support our good buddy, joe he is going to whoop your ass, dr Joe, dr buddy Joe, can I call him Jojo? He is going to whoop your ass, dr Joe. He is going to whoop you. I'm telling you, I'm going to tell him right now that you can continue. Is it almost like a man crush? Is it like a little man crush that you guys have?
Speaker 2:Oh, that's a fact. Y'all look it up and check out his very first episode here, and I want to here. It's about procrastination.
Speaker 1:I want to tell you guys that not only is he super nice, he's a good friend. He is doing the trailer pre-trailer, pre-launch kind of trailer for our book, so you'll hear him everywhere.
Speaker 2:So please support him.
Speaker 1:Support his show because it's just it's fun. I like listening to it.
Speaker 2:I like the sound effects.
Speaker 1:I mean, he's just a great guy. He's really smart and everybody needs to follow him because he's worth it.
Speaker 2:So Thank y'all for listening to Cadet of Smile Unstoppable.
Speaker 1:Unstoppable With.
Speaker 2:Victoria and Michael. A container smile, unstoppable, unstoppable with Victoria and Michael. My speech is you. Hey, I have a medical condition.
Speaker 1:That's for sleeping and that's not sleeping around, that's just sleeping. Goodnight y'all goodnight woman.
